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> Girl: Mom! aaj ek ladke ne mere gal pe kiss kiya.
Mom: Tune use chata mara ya nahi?
Girl: Mujhe achaak Gandhi ji yad aa gye,
Aur maine dura gal aage kar diya.

> Man: Talak lena hai,
Lawyer: Rs. 5000 lagenge.
Man: Pagal ho kya? Pandit ne Rs. 51 me shadi kar dit thi.
Lawyer: Dekh liya na saste kaam ka natija.

> Amitabh: mere pas Rocket hai,
Shurli hai, chakri hai,
Murga Bomb hai,
Anar hai, Tumhre paas kya hai?
Shashi kapoor: Mere paas MAA...
CHISH hai.

> Teacher: What is the differnce between Landline & Mobile?
Sardar ji again at his best:
Landline ka no. hum ungli se dial karte hain.
Aur Mobile ka Anguthe se.

> Wife saw sing board.
Banarsi Saree 10/-
Nylon 8/-, Cotton 5/-
Wife: Give me Rs. 500/- i'll but 50 saree.
Husband: Soordas ki amma ye londry ki dukan hai.

> Sardar:- Dr. shahab Plastic surgery me kitna kharcha ayega.
Dr.: 50000 ka.
Sardar: Agar plastic hum de to?
Dr. (gusse me): Sale pighla kar laga bhi lena.

> Machchhar apne pote se:
Beta humare jamane me khoon choosna itna asan nahi tha.
Pota: Dadaji Pahle ldkiya pure kapade pahanti thi.

> Dr. : Apke 3 dant kaise tut gaye...?
Santa: Wife ne Diwali ki mithai banai thi, Wo khaya hun,
Dr. : To mithai khane se mana kar dete.
Santa: Tab to 32 ke 32 tut jate.

> Degrees of girls
BA: Beautiful Ass
LLB: Lovely Likeable Breasts
BSC: Beautiful Sexy Cutes
MBBS: Member of Big Boobs Society
MBA: Married but Available.

> Santa: Meri pasand ki ladki ne mujhse shadi nahi ki,
Banta: Tune use bataya nahi ki tera chacha carorpati hai,
Santa: Han Bataya tha, Ab wo meri chachi hai.